How many of you feel that you have a disillusioned life? Have you reached an age where things have become stagnant like you are just going through the motions? Relationships may not be great, or you’ve put on weight, or do you feel bogged down in your job? Did you feel in your earlier years that things would work out differently? Do you feel you are going through the motions?
Steve Jobs used a morning practice to know when it was time to change things. He stood, looking into the mirror and asked, “If this was my last day to live, would I want to spend it doing what I am about to do?”. If the answer was no for more than a few days in a row, he realized he had to change something.
I have a disillusioned life. Some things I have completely nailed, other areas not so much. I have a lot of desire to change things, but working all day, managing kids as a single parent 50% of the time, and also trying to maintain a social life sucks away my motivation to evolve.
I also want to make one thing very clear, I am not looking for any pity. I know I am lucky. I am a white male with a nice house, a couple of lovely kids and great friends. I am generally fairly happy but there is definitely something missing. As I move into the second half of my life I feel there is something wrong, something I need to change. I wake up each weekday morning to go to the office and sort of dread the experience, even though for the most part it is a nice place to work.
It appears I am not alone. High rates of divorce in the United States (40-50% of marriages)¹, fewer than one-third of U.S employees are engaged in their jobs².
So, what to do about it? Personally, I am looking at the nine pillars of life and want to find a good balance in all of the areas, and I really want to excel in most of them.
The Nine Pillars of a well-balanced life are:
1) Career & Business
2) Family & Friends
4) Fun & Recreation
5) Giving & Contribution
6) Health & Fitness
7) Personal Development
8) Physical Environment
Out of this focus on the nine pillars, I want to find a solution to how I spend the majority of my time. That is, exchanging most of it for a paycheck. This realization this is a bad financial decision is not new, just do a Google Search on the subject and you will find a lot of people commenting on this.
The nine pillars are not new either. I didn’t come up with it, and there are other variations out there which may split categories into more granular categories.
Because I have started this exercise of finding balance, and also just being aware there are nine pillars, I wanted to share my experiences with you and pass on any good advice and resources that I come across. Hence this blog, disillusionedlife.com.
I look forward to not only improving my life but also others that might have similar feelings and experiences.
In my next post, I will explain how to establish a baseline in the nine pillars so you have a starting point to measure your improvement.